I Love My A.K

Hello my lovely followers. Mark here- I play keyboards and that in t'band. I also have a boozing hangover - so you can forgive me if reading this is a total waste of your time.

Bolt Action 5 head quarters are jumping ship from that heavenly enclave of north London known as Southgate (check your a-z- its in zone 12 or something), to the vastly superior Angel- where we wont have to auction off our Grandparents to pay for taxis, (sorry I meant gold plated Limousines) to chauffer us to gigs. Therefore please redirect your rabid fan mail in that direction. Just leave it in the bin by the tube station- our butler who used to play the triangle in Gay Dad will come pick it up.

But the biggest news from the world of BA5 is that we will be treating the good people at the Latitude festival in Suffolk to our idiosyncratic brand of Eurovision jazz reggae on the 14^th of July. Tickets are normally about a tenner, but they had to raise them to £95 this year after adding us to the bill. Some might say this is a bit steep, but they dont have Haribo addictions to feed. We were meant to headline, but we thought it only fair to give a less famous group like Snow Patrol a chance, so now we'll be playing in one of the tents- where all the cool kids hang out.

Anyway, Im off to eat some Kellogs Corn Flakes drenched in ice cold milk, so hope to see you at the Pleasure Unit on Monday. Bye Bye my loyal slaves. Ha! Ha! Ha!!!!!!!!!!!!!. (Cue ominous music and tonnes of dry ice as my eyes glow red and I disappear in a snap of fire and smoke- as demonstrated by that twat on the right).